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It's not only Audi that builds soul crushingly boring cars..

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:47 am
by RussianM3_dude
...Vokswagen does it too.

In a fit of sheer idiocy and total mental eclipse, after not extending a lease on my Maserati (warranty expired after 2 years) I got myself a Golf R. I have full access to a GT3 RS and my work contract is a bit iffy at the moment so I didn't want to get an expensive car. I really like the looks of the R and love the idea of an uber Golf. Despite the fact that I absolutely hated my RS4 and loath Audis in general (but maintain a professional interest in them) I got another VAG-ina group car.

What a mistake. I might as well have spent the money on blow and hookers... at least I would gave had some stories to tell the grand-kids. Here I basically burned the money in a pile.

Out goes one of the finest regular production 6 cylinder engines and in comes a polished turd of epic proportions. The car itself is quiet dull in a secure for a rubbish driver kind of way but it's the engine that ruins the show.

Not only it sounds terrible - like a Korean industrial vacuum cleaner, it has terrible lag and when the boost arrives... it's Bob Dole limp. Basically I have to anticipate in order to pull out in safe manner at busy intersections. The car bogs down unless you ride the clutch. The clutch action is loathsome too. One of the worst manuals I've driven in a while.
My city mileage? Between 17 and 19L/100kms where a BMW 130i did 14 at most. Downsized engines ONLY look good on paper. In real life they are utter turds. THERE IS NO REPLACEMENT FOR DISPLACEMENT. Look at the real world mileage the new 5.0 Mustang with 400hp+ gets... if only VAG was not run by closet Nazi accountants. Basically you get a bourgeois car with dull handling and a pretty banzai engine which you have to violate with that six speed <beep> in order not to feel like you bought a 1.2 TSI Golf. 3.6 VR6 would have been the PERFECT engine.

Meanwhile I could have bought a low mileage Alfa 147 GTA with THAT engine. I've tried one recently and it's like going from a Soviet Factory canteen to a 3 star Michelin restaurant. There was an aural orgy and my right foot was on the VIP list.

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 12:23 pm
by Blue_Thunder
Excellent, you've been to humour camp! :lol:

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 12:48 pm
by iR8V10
Interesting post on an audi forum? Good luck with it?

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 1:13 pm
by RichRS6
I completely agree with You about the R, a real step backwards imo a 3.6 V6 would have been so much better or Twin Turbos on the 3.2.

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 2:04 pm
by Contigo
Reading that post immediately conjured up images of two people

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Reminds me of TG's review of the Renault Megane which Partridge reads out over the phone to his ex-wifes boyfriend :D


"Oh. Is he still driving that Renault Megane? Yeah, can I just read you something from Top Gear magazine? No, it’s alright, I’ve got it here, I’ve got it here. [Opens the magazine on the bed and reads] “With a mere ninety break-horse-power available, progress is too leisurely to be called fast, but on the motorway in fifth gear the Megane’s slow pace really becomes a pain. Uphill runs become power-sappingly mundane, while overtaking National Express coaches can become a long, drawn-out affair.â€

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 2:10 pm
by bam_bam
This is exciting...

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RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 2:51 pm
by RussianM3_dude
With industrial resources Albert Speer could have only dreamed off. VW did not bother updating the 3.2 VR6. BMW could squeeze out 360hp from that displacement, 270 should have been walk in the park for Vag, as for journalists who onanize over 20 odd kgs that the move saved... Who gives a damn! It's a Haldex Golf, not a GT3 RS. Nobody will mistake it for a sports car.

Other dissapointments include the incontinent winshield washer jet nozzle that may or may not be fixed in a future recall (German quality!!!) and awfull seating position. In a bid to save a few euro cents, VW decided to omit the lever that helps you adjust the front edge of the seat, which leaves me sitting with my knees close to my ears and banging against an unusually voluminous steering tunnel. I still cannot get comfortable.

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:06 pm
by bam_bam
It's a good thing you took it for a test drive before you bought it, that way you'd already know about the awful seating position... oh wait.

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:26 pm
by RussianM3_dude
Well, didn't bother getting too comfortable during a test drive, I just naturally assumed that being a VW, the ergonomics would be top notch and I will be able to get comfy :-)

RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 7:20 pm
by RS6chris!
What a tosser you are...piss off back to your BMW forum.

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 8:16 pm
by gdavison
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Re: RE: It

Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:27 pm
by bam_bam
RussianM3_dude wrote:Well, didn't bother getting too comfortable during a test drive, I just naturally assumed that being a VW, the ergonomics would be top notch and I will be able to get comfy :-)
Then you've missed the point of the term "test drive", moron.