The Rules.

[bam_bam]

@the entire Snubsher Family

You misunderstand. There is no "snubsher" family. Read it again....

Oooooh, a bitter divorcee - I likes it!

No woman is a perfect zero,

A few other famous zero's that spring to mind......

Claire Short

Joe Brand

Rosie O'Donnell

The list, I'm sure is endless. Maybe the rest of the crew would add to the list?

...and yet all of the above were/are married, ergo, they were rated highly enough... obviously not by you nor I, but, I refer you to my earlier rant "...there is ALWAYS..."

If you choose to dip the well because it has a fancy R8 wrapper, you've still dipped that well......

Play safe. Rate them zero. If they are a zero, and sitting in the R8, kill them, remove the body, and have sex with the car instead Works for me




:):):)

You have seen the R18 (NOT the R8), right? Murder is not an option, I'm too pretty for jail and I've only just managed to give up smoking from my last 10 stretch in the clink.

[snubsherfamily]

@the entire Snubsher Family

You misunderstand. There is no "snubsher" family. Read it again....

Oooooh, a bitter divorcee - I likes it!

Ah. not quite, a different meaning again....

:):):)[/quote]
You have seen the R18 (NOT the R8), right? Murder is not an option, I'm too pretty for jail and I've only just managed to give up smoking from my last 10 stretch in the clink.[/quote]

Well I guess that if you'd comtemplate mating with Susan Boyle, then hunting for the soap on the prison shower floor isn't going to worry you either

Congrats on the stopping smoking

[liwi]

@Liwi Re: Rule 3. This is an Audi forum, thus, if it's a 500+BHP Audi, then apply the rule 3 maths and then take a look at your new-found hot self in the mirror. If it's not an Audi, go to another forum and see if you get the same kind of love. If you don't, you've bought the wrong car, however, I suspect any guy is going to rate a girl higher if she's sat in a 500+BHP motor.
Re: Rule 17. Really? Just so we're clear, you want me to prove that women wank more than men AND you want me to actually post photographic evidence? I'm pretty sure PhilT would ban me so I'll find another way; since this forum exists on the Internet, I shall use this tool as my proof of concept.
Aim: To prove women wank more than men.
Method: Type "photos of women masturbating" into Google images.
Results: Yielded 76,700,000 images.
Further results and method: I then skipped off with my laptop to have some "me" time. Before leaving, I asked lady_bam to conduct the very same search but insisting she lopped off the W and the O before MEN. I didn't hear from her for quiet some time, even though my ears were very, very sensitive during this period. Later, when lady_bam and I crossed paths, she sheepishly mentioned that her browser continually crashed and she could not record a number of hits from Google images. Thus, closing the case on this conundrum.
Conclusion: There is no proof that men masturbate but there are 76,700,00 photos of woman caught in the act. I know, I sampled a vast majority of these beautiful works of art.
Re: Rule 24. We're still waiting...

I hope this has been helpful.

I believe the Audi guys certainly are hotter than the Merc guys (in referral to your crossing over to mb forums) probably why the world still moves around here..

Although I must say your quote of 7670000 which I believe isn't 76,000,00 but 7,600,000?

My search on google, for both are as follows, as I got probably the same amount of time to waste as yourself, not washing the car today...
Photos of women masturbating : 18,200,000 results (0.28seconds)
Photos of men masturbating : 24,100,000 results (0.25 seconds)
and for google image search:
women: 271,000
men: 288,000

conclusion: without ending the world on 21.12.2012 by the supernova is that men wank more than women.

and some very weird pictures are circulating my mind

[bam_bam]

@ Liwi - someone's got their safe search switched on!

@ Family - I'm not fussy, I'd do the Queen of England just for the fame. You're probably being a tad harsh on SuBo though, she's not that bad. I mean, she's a virgin, she's got a fantastic set of lungs on her... <beep> it, pop her into an Audi A3 1.9 diesel, throw me a rubber and I'd tap that.

[liwi]

the only safe thing is the padlock outside my gates.
Once I was told, it was quite obvious that the female do wank more often as the male population weren't able to get them off and satisfaction was not even near after the whole 2 minutes of closeness. Then again, you could always plead that female can have multiple and not have to wait 20 minutes before the male had started to feel the urge again. But what do I know...

On another point, men still find the time and make the time to do this..

But back to the rules..


Ps really just after my composite handbag with the led lipstick light in one of the pockets it carry....

[bam_bam]

Two minutes!?!? Are you insane, you'd be lucky to get a two-pump chump out of this lot... stick with me Liwi, I'll show you the best 15 seconds* of your life.

* foreplay included.

[liwi]

I already got 4sec on my drive
didn't know your darth was that slow?

[Timster]

Bloody 'ell you two.... get a room

[Maximo]

Any chance we can ban the term "Fully Loaded" when placing an ad in the Classifieds?

[bam_bam]

I agree Max. I hate that term, are they selling a car or describing potato skins on an American fast food 'menu'?
Cnuts of a very high order.

[P_G]

Even worse when they are not 'fully loaded' and just have standard spec but the seller is too stupid to realise it. Surely fully loaded would be every conceivable optional extra and I doubt there are many people that ever did that.

[Maximo]

That's my point. It seems that most people think it's a good way to sell a car. While I'm in rant mode, lets ban the term "Rare" also. Come on people if it's a mass produced car it's NOT rare full stop. Yes I know there are a few exceptions to rule but not many.

Take my last car for example, BMW M3 saloon. It was one of only 50 cars in the UK, why because BMW changed the model spec from a 3 litre (bullet proof engine) to the 3.2 Litre. Did it make the car worth more or less? Nope. The only people that were interested were the people who already owned them.

[chunky79]

how about if you actually have a rare fully loaded car though?

[RSKiwi]

how about if you actually have a rare fully loaded car though?

Well then you will not suffer any abuse!

Most people, well certainly on here, will know if something is rare even if its another brand because we have a natural interest. The rest can fuc off.

[Timster]

You tell 'em Kiwi.

.... the cnuts.